Tap Tap Tap… The Message Is On The Wall
By Urban Thought on September 25, 2008 @ 8:32 am
Consumed in my own thoughts
as music blared from the headphones
stuck in my ears,
I break out of my trance
for a moment and look down.
I notice feet.
Feet with sling sandals.
But not ordinary feet.
These feet had age to them.
And as I’m making my way up the leg
that is attached to these feet
I see hair, lots of hair.
I go further and I start to realize
this isn’t a man but a woman.
This is a woman with old-looking feet and hairy legs
And then…
the cane that is next to those feet taps me.
Tap, Tap, Tap, on my Uptowns the cane went.
I look up at the old man with the cane
and he points at the sign
behind me.
And I look at the sign
without actually
turning around.
And I nod at him.
And he shakes his head.
And I go back into my trance.
The audible sound
of Spanish is spoken.
A woman at the door of the train
gestures to the young man
across from me.
She speaks her Spanish
and he nods.
He gets up
and motions to the old man
to sit down.
And I look at her
as she is looking at me.
And I turn my glance
to the young man
that got up.
The woman
then talks to the older woman
with the hairy legs,
in Spanish,
of course.
And I sit back
and relax in my trance,
trying to psych myself up
about getting into work
and ignoring all
the bull shit
that will ensue.
And then I think to myself…
Why did that man tap me.
And I look back at the sign
that I thought I saw
and instead see the sign
that the man
tapped my foot
and pointed to…
Priority Seating it said.
I looked at the young man
and thought to myself:
That was nice of him to get up.
That was nice of the woman
to ask him to get up.
Too bad
that man tapped me on my foot
for the seat
or I might have gotten up too
if he just asked.
You tap me
and point
and
I’ll deem it
disrespectful.
All my manners go out the window from there.
Today will be a good day.
This was a great read!!! Thanks for sharing this! I agree with you wholeheartedly. At the same time I’m thinking that maybe the “tap and point” system was his “only” way of communicating with you. We never know. But in general, if you’re capable of communicating in English, then by all means open your damn mouth and say what it is you must say.
Tough call for the old guy, though. If he had spoken to you, for all he knew you might have gotten angry because he’d let the whole car know you were sitting in the wrong seat.
It’s a tricky balance, in a big city, to be aware enough of your surroundings without becoming overwhelmed by them.
Hey I was in that same situation…except the old lady tapped me and gave me a note stating that she was elderly. So I got up…not once did she think to tap the men that was sitting there…she requested that a woman get up first not the men. Once I got up and looked back to see that men where still sitting …it pissed me off. So know Im like aint giving up my seat no damn more. That was so ridiculous!!
have a good day though
Great post on what we see and don’t see, what we pay attention to. It can be difficult to interpret what is really going on. Some people aren’t assertive when it comes to asking for a seat so they take what they think of as a less aggressive/indirect way by tapping or pointing. I’m not much into being tapped on or pointed to but being in an urban public transportation situation can be kinda…tricky.
I take the train to work but it’s a long train ride (hour) and where I begin and where I end up aren’t particularly urban as in Downtown Urban.
When I’ve taken public transportation during rush hour in the city? Dang, some grumpy people. Yeesh. Yet I also see kids and teens get up to give their seats to older or disabled people. It’s nice.
People do feel safe approaching me what with being small and female and Asian.
Oh – what a contrast with hairy legs and slingbacks. When I see women with hairy legs I wonder at how we work so hard to become physically hairless, scentless and smooth. I’ve been inculturated to think that smooth hairless legs look good on women.
This is a great read. BTW, I have an award for you over at my place. Do come by and pick it up.
me like women with hairy legs
THAT was a GREAT post. Very well told. *loved it*
ha.. you know you dead wrong but that is true… he could at least open up his mouth and speak… that tapping with the cane mess would have gotten no loe from me either
Very nicely told.
I only have an issue about giving an older person a seat if they’re demanding and pushy about it.
I remember once an old Asian lady got on the train and wanted to sit down in this tiny little crevasse between me and the next person. She stood in my face and with a mean look, waved her hand really aggressively in my face, motioning for me to move aside, like “move! move!!”. Well, of course, I just sat there and looked at her like she was crazy. Your disrespect gets MY disrespect, I don’t care HOW old you are. Well, the guy next to me gets up and gives her the seat, and then, all of a sudden, she’s all sugar and spice and smiles; “oh, thank you soooooo much, thank you, thank you. Ohhhhhhh.”. Mean, old, phony bitch. She wasn’t nice at all, judging by the way she treated me!
I was glad I didn’t move for her.
There is both good and bad tapping. I can’t describe it here but I know it when it happens and my manners also go out the window.
where you at?