Fair or Unjust?

By on March 21, 2008 @ 12:00 am

Yesterday while at daycare, my youngest niece was struck with a plastic hammer on her knee by one of her classmates. She immediately went into shutdown mode and my sister was notified. My niece was taken to the hospital because she was obviously in pain and wouldn’t talk. Today, we find out that she was bruised from the inside of her knee as a result of being struck with the hammer and she’s not able to be discharged from the hospital until tomorrow morning.

When my sister inquired about which child struck her daughter, she was informed that the school officials couldn’t release that information to her and that it was confidential.

We weren’t aware that by law, schools aren’t to disclose that information when something like this occurs. It’s supposed to protect the rights of the parent and child in case a problem should occur between the parent whose child was attacked.

As of now, we are not sure as to what procedures are being taken and I feel that with the school officials trying to keep this on the hush, that it isn’t fair.

Categories: Observation

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Jill/Twipply Skwood March 21, 2008

I’m so sorry that happened to her! Poor thing – overnight must have been scary. :-( :-( :-(

How old is your niece? I Do you know if the child who hit her is the same age?

We aren’t allowed to tell that information either. It’s good in that if it is an isolated incident, the child who did the hitting isn’t ostracized by the rest of the class (parents not inviting that child to a birthday party or not inviting that child over to play, etc.). And the parents and teachers have a chance to address the behavior.

The policy is probably in place to prevent parents of injured children from doling out whatever punishment they see fit on someone else’s child. I would think it had less to do with rights than with the physical safety of the hitter.

I think in theory it is a good rule, because there’s always the chance that a parent of an injured child might actually harm the child who did the hitting. But in reality, your niece will probably spill the beans as soon as she has recovered enough to speak.

Probably the teachers or day care workers feel horrible, awful. Probably the director or principal feels awful. Probably the parent of the other child feels awful. But as far as finding out who the exact child was…you’ll probably end up finding out eventually anyway.

But in the mean time you or your sister or brother could at least find out what the day care is doing – that the child’s parents are informed of what happened, that the child knows what he or she did was wrong and seriously injured, etc. That the school is aware of whether this was an isolated incident, or whatever other questions your sister or brother might have.

So very sorry your little niece had to go through this.

Kizz March 22, 2008

I think that it is a good idea to have that policy in place. I think that since your niece will incur some medical costs due to her overnight hospital stay, the school should play go-between in case the other family needs to pay some of the medical costs. It may be unfair, but every parent is not playing with a full deck. A friend of mine called herself informing a parent that her child was playing in an area that may be unsafe and the parent told her to mind her damn business. That’s the type of mindset that they may have to deal with.

Lisa March 22, 2008

Wow that must have been a pretty hard hit to cause an overnight stay in the hospital … poor baby!

I agree, at first glance, that law seems unfair, but it’s there to protect *both* parties. I can tell you from experience, there are some crazy parents out there who will refuse to believe that their precious cargo would ever do *anything* wrong and who wouldn’t think twice about finding out where your niece lives and turning up for a confrontation.

p.s. love your blog :=)

enemy of the republic March 23, 2008

I’m not sure I understand what happened. Are you protesting the law that says that day care must be silent about injuries? No need to tell me what happened as it isn’t my business–my son was born when all those daycare scandals were coming out and we were terrified. I don’t recommend this as a way of enhancing one’s marriage, but for 3 years I worked days and my husband worked nights–this way he always had a parent with him, we didn’t pay for day care and any screwups were the cause of our bad parenting. I know a lot of people can’t do this, especially single moms or people who simply have to work days. For my son’s sake, I am glad we did it, but it was tough on our relationship and only recently have we been able to come back from all that distance.

The comment above is all too true.When I was a teacher in Chicago, I had to jump a parent because she pulled a knife on another mother, claiming that her daughter had done…
There are scary people out there.

Good to see you!

skee stylus March 24, 2008

Am I missing something? In this age of lawsuits and legal action as a busines minded individual the goal is always to deflect the blame. By having a policy that doesn’t reveal the culprit you put the face of such incidents on the school not the student. I’m really sorry to hear that Thought…I hope everything is ok.

I remember in elementary school I stabbed a kid with hemophelia with a pen cause he tried to step to me. He almost blead to death and the school sold me down the river but I do guess that was 20 years ago.

The Fitness Diva March 24, 2008

Sorry to hear that this happened to your niece. I know I would be livid and trying to track the other child’s family down. I’m one of those crazy ones, I guess.

But at the same time, they should definitely be made to pay for the hospital bills, and the other child should be made to see the error of his/her ways. I know kids hit and fight, but if you don’t teach them it’s wrong, they will never learn better.

Nowadays people see their kids do bad stuff right in front of them and say absolutely nothing. That’s the world we now live in. I say bring spanking back into the schools!
It worked for my generation! Down in NC we got the paddle. And we were some damn good, polite as hell kids by the time we graduated! 😉

The Orange Phoenix March 24, 2008

Fitness Diva, I’m with you on the paddle thing – kids back then had more respect because they had someone or something to fear.

Poor baby, give her lots of hugs and kisses to take the edge off of the pain and fear of a hospital stay. . .

Televisiontraci March 25, 2008

Sounds like another good reason to keep my kid out of daycare. I realize everyone doesn’t have that option but these days it’s just too scary to trust other people with your kids. You just never know.

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