Who knew that having a mother who loves you is a foreign concept to some people?

Often, I wonder why people decide to have children. I’m sure there are plenty of reasons. Perhaps, you forgot to pop that pill or maybe old boy or girl didn’t feel like using a condom, because natural feels better or its just too big (don’t forget they make magnums.) You may even be using the rhythm or pull out method. You know, if you miss the rhythm then you might as well forget about pulling out. Perhaps there is that slim chance that you have planned your pregnancy. When both individuals plan to engage in the act of sex because they want to produce an offspring that they can love and care for.

No matter what the reason, nine months of pregnancy, strange cravings, back pain and emotional stress can take a toll on you. Don’t you think if you spent that much time going through so much that you would actually appreciate the life that comes out of you?

Just today, I found myself watching a woman play with a baby in a stroller while the father held onto the stroller. The whole time I’m thinking, this is cute. As ghetto as these three look, they sure do love their child. I later came to find out the woman fondling the child  isn’t actually the mother but someone who admired the child. When she parted ways with the young man and his little boy, she said, “He is so adorable. I want one.” My first thought: How sweet. My second: She doesn’t even look like she can take care of herself let alone a baby. I know it’s a critical way of thinking. Who am I to judge what she is capable of doing. But seriously, if I see you standing outside of the methadone clinic on a regular, I would think you had some unresolved drug issues that need to be addressed before you think about bringing life into the world.

TRUE STORY
While riding the train one day I over heard a conversation, a young man (around the age of 16) was having with his peers about the challenge of going home to his mother. Jamal described himself as an easygoing, happy dude. Someone who does his best to keep a smile on his face and lets nothing worry him. Through all his struggles he tries to keep his head above water knowing that there is a rainbow at the end of his long journey through turmoil.

Jamal is currently a high school-er, who found himself in trouble at one point in his life. Unlike some people, Jamal felt that it only takes one mistake for him to learn his lesson. As he moves forward in getting his life on the right path, going to school every day, looking for a job after work, seeing a counselor to determine his future, he has one obstacle to face, his mother. Who would have thought it? The one person that should support you is a naysayer.

Jamal’s mother sucks the happiness out of his day. When Jamal gets home he gets berated with comments such as, “What were you doing outside today? ‘Cause I know you didn’t go to school.” or “I don’t know why I even had you. I don’t even like you.” I don’t know about any of you but coming home to such negativity can wear down your soul, leave you feeling empty with little direction. Through Jamal’s conversation with his peeps, you can feel the agony that he goes though yet he is an optimist in getting out of his situation.

What is even sadder is the fact that he goes hungry most nights. He tells the story of only having two dollars in his pocket. He finds himself going to Taco Bell and getting two soft tacos to tide him over for the night. His own mother doesn’t cook, doesn’t keep food in the house and won’t give him money to get a decent meal.

Ghetto Angels
While Jamal is telling his story, he finds his peers feeling for him. They offer him comfort for every plight that he is facing. A meal for those days that he goes hungry. Extending their home as an escape from the grim dwelling he has to call home. What great support he receives from those around him. Something that he should get from his mother but yet something he can only wish for.

Being a mother is a blessing and shouldn’t be considered a curse. Telling your own child that you don’t love them should be the last thing that ever comes out your mouth. Imagine finding out that your mother doesn’t love you? Hangs you out to dry at every turn. What would you do?