Double Up, the new CD from that dude we hate to love, R. Kelly, has been released and its flirted its way to the top of the charts. I finally got a copy of the CD. It has 20 Tracks on it, I’ll be here for a while.

Process: Put the CD in the player and blog as I listen to it. Your process: skim through it if you like or just hit the X on the window. Thank you for stopping by.

1. The Champ - Ladies and Gentleman, the champ is here. Swiss Beatz produces the track, which is really different considering he either produces his own tracks or uses the likes of Track Masters. That is the beginning of the first track on R. Kelly’s first track. Dude is going off on all his critics. He isn’t singing but he is ranting, which is what he has been doing more lately. As he does the verses in rounds, ding round 1, ding round 2… Still waiting for the knock out. Lets see what pops… Last round is 10… he’s done and moves on… During the rounds, he lets you know its about the hood, its about the music… forget everyone else. He claims to be undisputed… That may be true. You can hate him. He doesn’t care.
2. Double Up (featuring Snoop Dogg) - Title Track… Now that I got that out the way (referring to track one) ‘lets double up’ he states. So he talks about being drunk in the club, having two girls - so that means he’s about to double up, getting in some fancy car and taking them home to do what he does best. Now, I didn’ t hear anything about what the age of these two females but I hope it wasn’t a kiddie club he hit up. From what I can hear he likes his toes sucked while getting his hair braided. Who knew? Not I. Here comes Snoop with his bars… of course he talks about smoke, taking your girl and having her for the night. Of course, some lesbo action occurs as well cause that is how the boss Snoop does.
   This track isn’t all that. I don’t care for it. But I’m sure someone will find joy in it.
3. Tryin’ To Get A Number (featuring Nelly) - Uh Oh… I hear the N-Word… I’m not surprised but I can do without it. Oh… This is a ho, bitch, nigga song. For some reason, I’m not feeling this track. Can anyone tell me why? It’s obvious. Don’ t read into it too much. SKIP
4. Get Dirty (featuring Chamillionaire) - ‘And this is for my niggas, bitches, playas, pimps‘ (his words, not mine)… Because those are the only folk who can actually listen to this garbage. The beat is hot but the words are getting to me (not a good thing). This could have been a hot track without these words. If you’re hood, you’d like this and it can be considered a club banga. As I’m concluding my thoughts on this track, I realize if I didn’t actually understand English I would play this in the club and actually enjoy it. But when you’re in the club the speakers are up loud and unless some shorty is grabbing your attention you can’t help but listen to the words, which aren’t the best.
5. Leave Your Name - This track is a long, outgoing message. Imagine calling R. Kelly’s home and waiting for his answering machine to pick up… And now you’re waiting for the beep, cause this track is 3:27 minutes long. He has had a long night drinking and smoking, he had someone drive him home because he is so messed up. He doesn’t know if he is coming or going. Sounds like one of your Friday or Saturday nights? This may be your anthem, R. Kelly is a mess (again, his words not mine). The song is mellow… It’s slow. Piano and all. Leave your name right after the beat, sure to get back to you if I’m not sleep or smoking on some trees, in the middle of having sex, faded or naked. And, its a wrap… SKIP!
6. Freaky In The Club - Its a nice tempo, nice sound. It has a hint of island with a touch of cool breeze (you have to hear it to understand). It has a ol’ skool feel to it (not too old though.) Another meet you in the club, rub against you, get you home and get it on number. Note to R. Kelly: You are from Chicago, IL, not an island. Stop trying to fake an accent. I can’ t listen to this anymore… SKIP!
7. The Zoo - I want to (fill in the blank here). That is the start of the track. It’s like a jungle atmosphere and we’re two monkeys. Should I go on? As he goes through the track, he’s about four different animals along with the female he is trying to get at. He is looking for this female to make monkey, cat, animal sounds cause his bedroom is like the jungle. I failed to mention that the beat is slow and easy. The sound is great if you aren’ t listening to the horrible lyrics. So he has taken it from the kitchen to the jungle. What other concepts can you come up with Mr. Kelly?
8. I’m A Flirt (Remix) (featuring T.I. & T-Pain) - Everyone knows this song. I mean really… It has a remix, so you have to know it. But that damn T-Pain with that line “ That’s Why They Call Me Teddy Bend Her Ass Down. Who calls you that T-Pain?
9. Same Girl (featuring Usher) - This song has been released as a single and I actually like it. R. Kelly and Usher are dating the same girl. Sounds familiar? Yes, I know. I’ve been done that road too, not. The concept is funny and all too real for someone I actually know. But all I can say is that this girl gets around. She is dealing with a dude from Chi-Town and ATL? Crazy. But that is entertainment.
   Favorite Lyric: “I know her like a pastor knows his word”
10. Real Talk - This is real talk (i never trust anyone who starts with a line such as this). This dude is talking over a track (how boring is that?). Did anyone see him on the BET Awards when he did In The Closet by himself? This reminds me of that. Imagine sitting in the room with R. Kelly as he curses his girl out on the phone ( i.e., you only here one part of the conversation - but he repeats what she says so you understand what’s going on). Premise: His girl calls him on the phone. Her friend saw him at a club with some other girl. She calls him out on it. “Just because your friend saw me at the club smoking and drinking with other bitches…” He goes off on the female in this one.
11. Hook It Up (featuring Huey) - Has your boy ever hooked you up with someone? This is that song. Yo… You got a friend? Hook my boy up. You got a cousin? Tell her to hook it up. Its a referral service song (they make songs about anything these days, so the time was coming on this one). Who is Huey? I’ve never heard of him. But he’s on it. He does his thing. OK. I’m done. SKIP!
12. Rock Star (featuring Kid Rock) - This is different. I like different. It’s rock infused. Everyone seems to be getting into rock, like Walk this Way from Run DMC. Luda gets on this track and does his thing. Another get a ‘girl and freak off’ song (nothing new.) I like it minus all the lewd talk.
13. Best Friend ( featuring Keyshia Cole and Polow Da Don) - So R. Kelly gets locked up. Keisha is at home taking care of the kids… And, then there is R. Kelly’s best friend. So you know what that means? R. Kelly is locked up. The Best Friend is holding down Keisha… Holding her down to the bed, the couch or anything else he can pin her to. And, now Kelly is pissed. But, that is the song. You’ve been doing my best friend… Hell to the naw (I miss Whitney & Bobby) - is what the song says. I actually like this cut. Yep… It’s going in the favorites. The concept is cool and believable (its hood.)
14. Rollin’ - This could be a club hit if a DJ is smart enough to mix it right. It has some strong bass and tremble to it. Turn up the volume on this one and bang your head. Premise: He is Rollin’. He is ballin’. Now that he has it all everyone wants to be on his sh*t. Yep, thats all its about. SKIP!
15. Sweet Tooth - It’s a slow song. A lot of metaphors and what not. You can laugh at the lyrics if you’re high enough. Reminds me of “You remind me of your jeep… Something like my car…” But instead of vehicles, its all about the candy. All up in your middle, oh, whoa… it tastes just like Skittles. Whoa… Great going, Kells (sarcasm.)
16. Havin’ A Baby - R. Kelly is having a baby. I don’t know who the female who is singing on this track but I like her voice (she isn’t credited on the back of the CD) He is proud to be having this baby (which isn’ t always the case in the hood). This song flows nicely. This is the type of music he should make more of. Very clean, very uplifting. She is having the baby and now he wants to get married (that is very ol’ skool.) The song takes you from when she gets pregnant through marriage… all the way to the birth. You hear a baby crying at the end. Gotta love it.
17. Sex Planet - This is a slow song. You know you are coming toward the end of the CD when all the good music starts poppin out. R. Kelly is taking it to the solar system as he wants to taste your milky way (if a dude is reading this, he doesn’t mean you.)
18. Rise Up - A tribute to those who were lost in Virginia. One thing, I have to say is this dude has heart. When he actually gets to his spiritual side, he can make some great, inspirational music. For this, R. Kelly is an artist and a great one at that. The track sounds like Heal The World. Favorite Lyric: “Struggle has no color.”
19. [Blank] - Five seconds of nothing. If you are looking to save room on your iPod do not upload this track. It is simply a space holder.
20. Ringtone - All the shorties have Kells on their ringtone. The beat is hot. The overall track is cool. Caution: R. Kelly raps on this track (he also uses the N-Word). I’m adding this to my playlist.

That is the end of what is considered the longest CD, I’ve had the opportunity to listen to this year. With 18 tracks of songs (1 & 19 don’t count from where I sit) you are sure to get your money’s worth, if you like R. Kelly.

Overall I actually like the CD (once I get pass the profanity, racial slurs, and women-bashing). R. Kelly has become a father, gets locked up, visited the nine planets, visited the zoo, had a threesome, hooked up with a bunch of females from the club and is happy that you have him as your ringtone. With all that, on one CD you can’ t go wrong.

Get your copy today (even if its off the street.)

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